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HeightsCast

Parenting through the Middle School Doldrums

What do our children need most from us in the unsteady years of middle school? First, says Head of Middle School Andy Reed, they need our availability.

But making ourselves fully and honestly available runs contrary to so many modern patterns of life, from work demands and short schedules to the ever-tempting screen. In fact, Mr. Reed calls it the Mount Everest of Modern Parenting: replacing frenetic patterns with quiet, contemplative patterns for our own mental management, so that we can be available to the boy who needs us at unexpected times.

Chapters:

1:35 Middle school’s rough reputation

6:39 A boy in search of his role

9:30 Attention shouldn’t be sourced in worry

11:44 How to trust the boy

22:54 A family culture of availability

26:27 Parenting spectrum: from buddy to manager

28:57 The golden mean: accompaniment

31:13 Quiet patterns over frenetic ones

42:28 How to deliver advice

Also on the Forum:

Parenting: Patience or Optimism featuring Andrew Reed

There Is No Manual by Alvaro de Vicente

What Parents and Teachers Need to Know about The Male Brain by Dr. Joseph Lanzilotti

Educating Leaders with Thomas More featuring Dr. Stephen Smith

Featured Opportunities:

Parents’ Conference at The Heights School (April 25, 2026) – link coming soon

The Art of Teaching Boys Conference at The Heights School (May 6-8, 2026) – waitlist

Teaching Essentials Workshop at The Heights School (June 22-26, 2026)

Convivium Conference for Teaching Men at The Heights School (November 2026) – link coming soon

About the Author

Andrew Reed

Head of Middle School, The Heights School; Leaders Initiative Director

Andrew Reed began his career at The Heights School in 1998 and assumed his current role as Head of the Middle School in 2000.

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